Thursday, June 16, 2011

Why The Boston Bruins Won The Stanley Cup

  • The Sedin's went missing... Like... Phil Kessel Missing...
  • Brad Marchand's nose for the net led the way with 11 goals, 5 of which came in the Finals
  • Roberto Luongo chirped Tim Thomas after Game 5 - The Hockey Gods don't like that. How can you chirp Tim Thomas anyways? He seems like such a nice guy.
  • Keith Ballard shitting the bed and getting scratched most of the playoffs while making $4.2M for the next 4 seasons...
  • The Bruins wanted to win in Canada so 19 year old rookie, Tyler Seguin, could celebrate legally
  • Two Swedes and a Cup is not a video I'd want to see as the sequel to 2 Girls 1 Cup.
  • Canucks had no secondary scoring - check that - they had nobody scoring. 8 goals in 7 games is not going to win you a championship
  • Don Cherry would say that the Bruins had more Canadian born players so that's why they won
  • The Canucks didn't have a chance against the Cam Neely Curse.
  • There were also rumblings that Cam "The Hoss" Neely threatened most of the Canucks lives
  • He wasn't flashy, but Tomas Kaberle did put up 11 points during these playoffs, including a team leading 5 powerplay points (ok that's not much, but he still led)
  • Patrice Bergeron put up 20 points in 23 games, but most importantly shut down the other teams top lines during the playoffs on his way to a +15 rating
  • Defence wins championships and the Bruins had 13 players in the top 15 for plus minus with Chara leading the way with as a + 16
  • TIM THOMAS - the best road hockey and ice hockey goalie in the world.
  • David Krejci with little fanfare led the playoffs in points with 23, including 4 game winning goals
  • Milan Lucic put the team on his massive curved shoulders and led the way physically for the Bruins
  • Shawn Thornton only played 7 minutes a night during the playoffs, but used them wisely and had a huge impact as a role player
  • In the game of life a 7 foot Czech always beats a Swedish Ginger (unless you are at the rippers)


  1. Wow Ballard is a bust. Wonder what the nucks are going to do with him.

  2. "Two Swedes and a Cup is not a video I'd want to see as the sequel to 2 Girls 1 Cup."

    Thanks for reminding me of that video

  3. Tim Thomas played out of his mind. That is the mean reason for Boston winning.

  4. Tim Thomas played great and loved seeing Kabby lift the cup:)

  5. I didn't know Keith Ballard was making that much.


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