Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Dock Talk: New Division Names

We love hitting the cottage on weekends and most of the time just talk hockey up there. Dock Talk is a summary of a conversation this past weekend while up north drinking beers on the water. We'll do our best to remember what was said, but sometimes dock drinking gets messy.
Last week the NHL announced the 4 new division names and it seems Gary Bettman is a fan of geographical regions compared to actually naming divisions after the past builders of the league. The four new divisions are the Pacific, Central, Atlantic and the Glen Metropolitan Division. Goodbye are the Northeast, Northwest, and Southeast. Hello to the... Metropolitan Division?

We're no geography experts, but when we think of the Atlantic we think of the Maritimes or the East Coast United States. You know, places that are a short drive to the ocean. Seeing Toronto, Detroit, Montreal and Ottawa in the Atlantic has us wondering if Bettman is predicting global warming to speed up and thinks Ontario will be the new east coast of Canada.

And what the hell is the Glen Metropolitan Division? The first thought that comes to mind is some faux hockey fan yuppie drinking out of a martini glass saying "I dare say, the Metropolitan Division is a tad weak this year, do you concur?" Sure a majority of the teams in that division play in major cities, but it just doesn't have a good ring to it and makes us think of Neapolitan ice cream.

Some critics of the new division names wanted to see them named after Gretzky, Lemieux, Howe and Orr. But all we need is Gretzky to get caught up in some gambling ring and Lemieux to have a falling out on the ownership side and you have to rename the divisions all over again. We personally hoped they would have just gone back to the old school Patrick and Adams Divisions in the East, and the Norris and Smythe Divisions in the West. It's simple and worked before despite most people having no idea who these men were. The names carried some historic weight to them and there's nothing wrong with keeping history alive... unless you're Tim Leiweke.

1 comment:

  1. Already hate this Metro division


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